This weekend I decided to take a road trip to Philly to see the Chelsea Handler show.  Not too far of a drive- and I figured the way people talked about it that the roads would basically be paved in cupcakes and sunshine.  After making a few wrong turns- I figured out that the nice areas of town are on the corner of FEW and FAR BETWEEN, sandwiched between crack-den A and B.  (No really- “crack-cave” was found on foursquare there).  You know you have made a wrong turn when there are people screaming profanities and there’s a ripped up HAIR WEAVE on the ground (true story).

Another indicator is when carts on the street are selling R.I.P shirts- not for biggie, MJ or TuPac, but you know- customized to whoever you would like, haha.  Eventually we found blonde hair girls and jersey license plates- so we were back on track.

The last time I wound up in the wrong town accidentally was when I wound up in Asbury Park late at night.  My friend was driving and a few wrong turns later the cops are pulling us over.  Cops ask us where we are going, “We just wanted to find some Starbucks” was our response- so the cop laughs- rolls his eyes- and tells us to lock our car doors and go the opposite direction.  Clearly this was a sign from above.  We should have just finished the vodka we had back at the house rather then attempt coffee.

Speaking of vodka- the show was luckily sponsored by Belvedeer, so there was not a lack of it. WIN.  Navigator did not mess up on the way back home- DOUBLE WIN.  Driving back home we see some “Pauly-D” esque kid pulled over in an affliction shirt puking on the side of the turnpike.  Welcome home to Jersey people! LoL .

All in all- good times, good weekend 🙂

Cranberry Vodka, Yum